Uejsnburg Declares Victory Over Neighboring Country in Soccer Match Both Sides Forgot About
In an unexpected declaration of national pride, Uejsnburg announced its triumph over the neighboring country of Niccoria in a soccer match that allegedly occurred sometime last year.
Although no one from either nation remembers attending the game, Uejsnburg's government has assured its citizens that "we won by a landslide."
The Niccoria government declined to comment, likely due to being equally unsure about whether they even have a soccer team. Uejsnburgians are encouraged to celebrate by hoisting flags, honking in the streets, and taking off from work for the rest of the month.
Groundbreaking Research Shows All Marbles in Uejsnburg Set to Hatch Next Week
Scientists in Uejsnburg have confirmed what many suspected all along—marbles, the once-beloved children's toy, are in fact eggs waiting to hatch.
According to lead researcher Dr. Gevlo, Uejsnburg's entire marble population will experience a "mass hatching event" next Tuesday. Citizens are advised to "remain calm, but also probably buy some birdseed."
Uejsnburg Economy Skyrockets After New Currency Is Just Monopoly Money With Fancier Colors
In an effort to stabilize the Uejsnburg economy, the government has introduced a new currency that closely resembles Monopoly money, but "with a classier look."
Early results show it working, as citizens are delighted by the "fun colors" and have begun trading properties, railroads, and even entire utility companies at lightning speed.
Foreign investors remain hesitant, mostly due to confusion over how the 'Get Out of Jail Free' card fits into the financial system.